Tuesday, 17 December 2024

Dealing with an unreasonable & impractical manager

Dealing with an unreasonable and impractical manager requires a combination of mindset shifts, tactical strategies, and personal boundaries to protect yourself from burnout. Here’s how you can counter the situation:



1. Detach Yourself from Their Behavior

Perspective: Recognize that your manager’s unreasonable behavior reflects their incompetence, not your abilities. Stop expecting rationality from someone who has shown otherwise.

Action: Focus on doing your best within the circumstances. Mentally separate your worth and performance from their poor management.

Mantra: "I can only control my actions, not theirs."



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2. Prioritize Ruthlessly

Perspective: Since your manager overloads tasks and makes unreasonable requests, accept that you can’t do everything perfectly.

Action:

Communicate Priorities: Politely clarify, “I’m working on X right now. Which task should I deprioritize to focus on this new one?”

Set Limits: When it's time to leave, calmly explain what you’ve completed and what remains, then leave without guilt.


Key Phrase: “I’ll finish this task first—let’s plan the rest realistically.”



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3. Emotionally Distance Yourself

Perspective: View their unreasonable behavior as noise, not a personal attack. They are likely projecting their own inadequacies.

Action:

Practice emotional detachment: When they make absurd requests, respond professionally without emotional involvement.

Use neutral language: “Noted, I’ll address it tomorrow first thing.” Avoid debating or showing frustration.

Remind yourself that you don’t have to fix their flaws.




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4. Time Management: “Manage Up”

Perspective: Your manager’s delays and last-minute requests are not your responsibility.

Action:

Document Everything: When they add tasks late, send a summary email: “As discussed, I’ll handle X tomorrow since it’s late today.”

Set Boundaries Calmly: If asked for work close to leaving time, say, “I’ll start this first thing tomorrow for better results.”

Plan and prioritize what you can reasonably complete.


Key Insight: Their urgency doesn’t have to become your crisis.



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5. Focus on Your Goals, Not Their Chaos

Perspective: Remember why you’re working—whether it’s for career growth, financial stability, or gaining experience. Your manager’s behavior is temporary.

Action:

Reframe the experience: "Working with this manager teaches me resilience and patience."

Keep your eyes on your goals: Document achievements and skills you’re gaining for future opportunities.

Use this challenge to strengthen your ability to handle difficult people.




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6. Maintain Control Over Your Energy

Perspective: If you allow their behavior to frustrate you, they gain control over your energy. You don’t owe them your peace of mind.

Action:

Take short breaks to reset mentally. Use deep breathing or a quick walk.

Use “mental shutdowns”: At the end of the workday, mentally switch off thoughts about work.

Avoid ruminating about their behavior—acknowledge it and move on.


Mantra: “I won’t let this ruin my day. It’s just a job, not my life.”



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7. Develop Tactical Resilience

Perspective: They may delay intentionally, but you can still prepare for their habits.

Action:

Preempt Delays: Start tasks as early as possible to counter their last-minute changes.

Communicate Clearly: “For this task to be done well, I’ll need X amount of time. Should I start now, or is this flexible?”

Anticipate extra work before leaving time, and set mental boundaries to decline politely when needed.




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8. Build External Support Systems

Perspective: You don’t have to endure this alone.

Action:

Find allies or colleagues who share similar experiences and vent constructively.

Seek mentorship or career advice outside of work to gain perspective.

Focus on hobbies and personal goals outside work to maintain balance.




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Key Mindset to Adopt:

View the situation as a challenge to build resilience and problem-solving skills.

Remember that you are not responsible for fixing an unreasonable manager.

Focus on your long-term growth and recognize this as temporary.


By detaching emotionally, prioritizing effectively, and reframing your mindset, you can minimize burnout and remain unaffected by your manager’s unreasonable actions. Focus on what you can control—your attitude, energy, and output—not their behavior.


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